Updated: May 25, 2020
I don't even know where to begin.
Let me put it this way — I don’t want this review to sound negative. Yes, I will bash the movie; yes, I will also enjoy it, but I do want everyone to go see this movie. I think it is a work of bad movie art. I haven’t been this confused by a film since I watched Donnie Darko as a 13 year old. When I say confused, I don’t mean by the story, plot, or any narrative elements if there truly were any; I mean I’m confused about how this film truly came to be a ‘film’.
When I heard that Glenn Danzig was making a movie, I was on board. I’m a huge fan of Misfits and his solo work as a singer-songwriter. We’ve already seen some pretty good work turned out by metal musicians-turned-horror directors, Rob Zombie being the prime example. Metal and horror have such a tight-knit relationship, aesthetically and lyrically. So I thought, what could go wrong? Turns out literally everything.
Verotika, which apparently stands for Violence + Erotica (something that I wish I’d known before starting this movie), is based off of a comic book also written by Glenn Danzig because, well, of course it is. The ‘film’ focuses on three different stories that play out like short films, linked by no apparent theme of any sort. It’s quite absurd, and if I were to break down each story I would have to make three separate reviews. That’s how much there is to unpack with this film. Each story has at least 10+ minutes of gratuitous nudity. Why? That's what you get when most of the actresses in this movie are known pornstars.
What I will say is that this film exceeded my expectations in terms of how bad I thought it would be. I love ‘bad’ movies more than the next — The Room is my bible — and Verotika just rose straight to the top above current stinkers, like Fred Durst’s The Fanatic. If you’re curious to see what it would be like if Tommy Wiseau made a horror movie, watch this film. Everything from the dialogue, to the sets, the score, the costumes, everything is so horrendously bad that I think it’s actually a work of art. You couldn’t replicate this complete and utter nonsense even if you tried. Glenn Danzig, you have really outdone yourself.
I just have one question… Who the hell funded this?
“Well, there’s your motive. He wanted her face!”